Being extreme v consistent

I’d like to share one of my favorite quotes with you that I find to be such an incredible and impactful reminder, that I keep a notecard with these exact words on it on my bathroom mirror, and I look at it every single day — Jim Rohn, American entrepreneur, author and motivational speaker sums it up perfectly in a matter of just a few words; “You don’t have to be extreme, just consistent.” Often times (at least that I can share from personal experience) it’s too easy to get caught up in feeling the need to do ALL the things, and, if you’re anything like me, the need to be the BEST at all the things. However, this mentality can be a slippery slope that ultimately results in burnout and a constant state of feeling like you’re falling short. The best way to set  yourself up for success when setting a goal, is to keep in mind that practice makes progress and moving forward, at any rate, is a win; celebrate every victory, big or small. Don’t dwell on the fact that you tripped up, don’t pick yourself apart with negative self-talk, and don’t you dare throw the towel in. Starting over, making adjustments, shedding a few goals to focus more intently on a smaller handful of them, is OKAY! You are not less than, you are not a failure, you are not weak — you are a force of nature! You are allowed to make mistakes, and becoming the best version of you is well-worth the investment of your time and energy. 

You don’t have to do ALL the things. You only need to do ONE thing in this moment. Once you can zero in on that simple fact, you’ll find that your day consists of a series of “in this moment” decisions made one after another until the day is done. If you weren’t running on all cylinders today, that’s okay. Operating out of sixth gear at all times is a nearly impossible feat and is not sustainable in the long run. There’s no need, nor expectation from anyone that you are to be nose to the grindstone 100% of the time. Have some grace with yourself. Life will get in the way and that’s inevitable. Your priorities will shift depending on what is needed of you in that moment. Strive to find a steady pace at which you’re able to maintain and just keep moving in the right direction — if your daily efforts are focused on this concept, consistency will develop organically and traction will become a byproduct.

So what happens when you hit a speed bump, or a wrench gets thrown into your seemingly perfect approach? It’s not a matter of if this will happen, but when. And it’s crucial that you’re prepared to pivot and readjust accordingly. Establish a plan of action for when you are removed from an environment in which you are able to control nearly every variable. Create space to forgive yourself for when you do slip up and a route for correction to get right back on track.

Let’s say you’re wanting to make some changes in your dietary habits and start working out to lose weight and lead a healthier lifestyle. You’re a week in and things are going great… until you go on vacation with your spouse. You’re finishing the salad you ordered for dinner, which now justifies the dessert you’re going to order, along with a third cocktail; after all, it is all-inclusive. You packed a few outfits to workout in with the very best intentions of actually doing so, but they never leave the suitcase. The next thing you know, you’re returning from vacation mentally shaming yourself for making mistake after mistake and beating yourself up over the fact that you didn’t stick to your diet or workout while you were away. Your new plan is to go on a week-long juice cleanse to offset all of the garbage and alcohol you consumed in Mexico as punishment for your failure and lack of self-control. Whoa.. stop. Not okay. What IS okay is enjoying yourself on vacation. What IS okay is remembering that everything should be enjoyed in moderation, especially if you have goals associated directly with your nutrition. What IS okay is being honest and realistic with yourself about the boundaries you set before being tempted to fall off track. When confronted with a decision to make, ask yourself “does this contribute to the path I want to be on?” Before embarking on a new journey or putting a goal in motion, I encourage you to rid yourself of the the “all or nothing” mindset. It’s not conducive to your success and will only delay progress. Also remember to be K I N D to yourself. The person’s words that you believe and listen to the most are your own. Read that again.

Real life is hard. I get it. I’m a mom of two and I work full-time. It’s important to me that I’m present with my patients and my coworkers when I’m at work, and with my children and my husband when I’m at home. I also have personal goals regarding my own physical and mental wellbeing — all of this comes with a lot of intentional action. I’ve learned the hard way that by giving 110% to one area of my life, consequently other areas suffer by getting whatever energy is leftover. I’ve also learned that it’s impossible to give 100% to multiple areas of my life simultaneously without feeling spread too thin and overwhelmed. Some seasons of my life require me to be more heavily involved in my role as a mother, such as when we brought home our son from the hospital last March and I was navigating through caring for both a 3 1/2 year old and a newborn. Other seasons have required more of my attention as an employee when I’ve taken on additional tasks in the workplace. It’s always changing and that’s life. That being said, I continue to adapt and rearrange things in my day to day life so that I can still make time for the things that are important to me. If my goal is to workout at least three days a week, I make it a point to wake up at 4:15a and workout in the garage a minimum of three days a week. When the gym was a much larger focus in my life prior to my husband and my children, I’d devote at least an hour of my time five days a week, sometimes twice a day there. However, that would be incredibly extreme, and honestly a bit excessive with my lifestyle now, because my priorities have shifted. This doesn’t mean that I don’t still value physical fitness, it means that I’ve made room in my lifestyle as it is today that allows for me to be consistent in this practice. I choose to workout while the rest of my family sleeps so as not to have to sacrifice my time in the evenings with them when we’ve all returned home. I also choose to go to bed by 9p at night because I value my sleep and know that I’m a nicer version of myself when I’m well rested. These two choices are only a couple of examples of small decisions I consistently make on a daily/weekly basis that are easy to maintain and that pave the way for me to continue moving in the right direction. My expectations are realistic and achievable and that empowers me to press on each time I am successful at hitting the mark.

I’d like to challenge you to focus less on the end-goal and more on the journey. Appreciate the process and trust that the beauty lies in the many paths belonging to the trail being blazed by you and you alone. Bet on yourself, and put your faith in the small choices you make on a daily basis and the habits you establish that contribute to your momentum and to your success.

“You don’t have to be extreme, just consistent.”